Marriage vs. Living Together
Public morality has recently changed a lot, but the traditional view of marriage is still fairly common even with a ban on sexual relations before marriage. The concept of “a civil marriage” standing for living together become a part of our modern life, but the attitude of a society is traditionally divided into two parties trying to convince each other. Typically, probably due to gender, men often prefer to remain free and simply live together, when women see marriage as an opportunity to feel protected – socially and financially. Basically, living together lures people who seek freedom when marriage is a basis for support and stability.
There are many popular arguments in favor of “a civil marriage” or living together. The main of them are freedom and equality. Many people argue that staying together without a procedure of a legal marriage shows their true impulses – love, but not obligations “before God and humanity”. Maybe they really think so, but the public looks at the situation completely differently: a man in a civil marriage is still considered to be a bachelor when a woman is seen as the one who cannot get married. The other people see a civil marriage as a preparatory stage for a family life. Basically, the argument is quite common, because living together helps to know each other better and get used to a variety of situations. Final argument here is saving money. Despite the fact that most of girls from their childhood dream of a white dress and a luxurious celebration, one must admit that these costs are causing serious damage to a family budget. Some couples choose to spend money in a different way – a good rest, repair and re-furnishing of an apartment.
Surely, there is the other side of this aspect. Marriage legally gives a sense of stability. However, it is just a feeling: statistics show that 100 marriages lead to 53 divorces. As one can see, the numbers are pretty impressive. Secondly, marriage can be beneficial for career. It is no secret that employers prefer to hire married employees: people who are in marriage seem to them the most stable and therefore the most attractive employees. Thirdly, there is a desire to prove the seriousness of relationships. It is no secret that relationship should be developed. After a period of dating there should be another step. It is replaced by a proposal to live together; then, the best time to have children is chosen, etc. To prevent the relationship from becoming “frozen”, people need time to transfer to a new stage. Of course, there is no dogma – everyone has their own life, but at some point a wife in a civil marriage starts to think about what she does not like in her half especially when, after an impressive term, relationships are not moving forward.
Counting all pros and cons of both choices, it should be concluded that a society perceives a woman living together with a man as a lover, when a civil husband is a free single men who is still in his search. Even though living together has a lot of positive aspects, nowadays society fail to accept such a form of relationships. Men's failure to officially register a marriage shows that he does not want to lose his freedom. Woman living in a civil union does not feel her man’s real support. She sees that a partner does not make decisions, avoiding responsibility for their future together. As a result, a woman is tired mentally to be a leader in their relationship. Of course, the circumstances are different. So now one can see the pros and cons of living together and registering a marriage. Of course, there are many details. Undoubtedly, every couple should take their own decisions and reach their own compromises, but the decision on registration or refusal to formalize the relationship should be mutual. Otherwise, the relationship is defective.
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